Why men have affairs?
Chat about a loaded theme that no one wants to chat about, this is it. Amusing thing, extramarital affairs have been going on ever since ancient times. Extramarital relationships can be burdened with troubles, cause sadness, and other troubles. Plus you must wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and honesty issue, finances, age dissimilarity, spiritual background, guilt, and on and on. I expect there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I shall identify an affair as a long term, maybe decades long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, married woman looking for dating married men.
Why do people have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are seek affair. I am sure typically though it is only the human condition, the need for love, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and cherished. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and fun, and sex makes us escape the real world for a small period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Somebody are able to turn the craving on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another human being, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos society has erected against affairs. For lots of people the yearnings will overcome their doubts and make them risk the fury of not only their relatives, but the public too. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is awfully pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically driven sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not harm your spouse or anybody else? You will need to minimize the risk you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is advantageous to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the biggest grouping, huge in fact. There are many couples whose marriage is over, apart from they are comfortable in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to consider. Your assets are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live as a family besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that stop them completing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An affair from time to time solves the problem while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Avoidance, sadly this is a ordinary reason I fear. One or the other, as a rule the husband is sexually neglecting his woman for a multitude of reasons. As a man I truly appreciate you guys neglecting your ladies and making them obtainable to us males of romance, making them “milf wives” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Maybe its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, maybe caring is gone, could be it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Maybe we have simply developed distantly, our common interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is conflicting of what you want. Maybe I just don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they search for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for financial gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair